Overcoming Food Struggles
The question I put
to you as 2019 comes to a close is: what is your
biggest struggle with food?
Whatever it is, I'm almost certain I've addressed it below - read on,
Sis.
What I am sharing
with you today has come from a lot of conversations during December, mostly
through sisters popping up in my DMs on Instagram. I often talk with girls about their biggest
struggles with food. Chasing Freedom
started with my food and body image struggles and that's where it's flourished
since. It's why the topic is so close to
my heart. While I know exactly what I
struggled with in the past, I'm always keen to hear what other people struggle
with the most too, so that we can ALL head in the same direction.
So, when I ask girls
what their biggest struggle with food is, here's what I get most often...
Sweet Tooth And Sugar Cravings
I get this one ALL.
THE. TIME. If your sweet tooth is
holding you back from your goals, here's what I have to say:
1. Stop fighting your sweet tooth.
You
don't need more rules to break. Am I
right? You need to stop resisting sugar
like it's the enemy. Sugar is good. It tastes delicious. When we make it an enemy, we feel the need to
wake up every day and fight it because we have convinced ourselves that sugar
is bad. And that is so exhausting. I challenge you to shift into a new way of
viewing sugar and sweets...Give yourself
unconditional permission to eat sugar.
I know this sounds unconventional and counter-intuitive, especially
coming from a health coach, but here's an example to help this make sense...
Most
of us have unconditional permission to run whenever we want, but how much do we
actually run? Here's the thing: the
reason why we don't run every day is because we aren't fighting it. We don't wake up every day thinking
"running is holding me back from my health goals", but with sugar, we
have convinced ourselves that it is SO bad and we end up creating a stronger
desire for it than is really necessary. We give it WAY more attention than it deserves. When we can realize that sugar is not the
enemy and it's our mindset that's the issue, that's when we can start to
overcome it.
When
you give yourself unconditional permission to eat sugar whenever you want, you
can start to treat it like the unconditional permission to run - it's a release
from fighting it. It's so confusing for
your mind when you tell yourself it's this bad thing, but you also know it
tastes really good. These conflicting
thoughts create resistance and give sugar more power over your life. And that's the part that's not good for
you. We have so many other sins in our
lives that need our fight and energy. I
guarantee you, things will start to change in your life when you do this.
2. Stop stressing about sugar while you're eating it.
If
you're stressing about sugar, WHILE eating sugar, then you're creating a whole
new problem. When you're by yourself and
you go to the gas station and end up grabbing that candy bar, and then you're
in your car stressing about how you shouldn't have bought that candy bar while
you're eating it, your body is going to produce cortisol and stress hormones
that have a huge negative impact on your body. So it becomes a double whammy; sugar AND
stress.
If
you sit back and just enjoy something sugary, then the experience is going to
be completely different than you inviting stress into an already stressful
situation for your body. Stress impacts
our bodies in so many ways; it creates obesity and disease. Stress on stress on stress is one of THE most
unhealthy things for us! So as much as what we are eating is important,
handling our stress and releasing the fight is also SUPER important!
3. Your sweet tooth isn't holding you back, your mindset
is.
This isn't a
blame thing. At all. We are bombarded with all the 'shoulds'
and 'shouldn'ts' around food...back off Satan! Your spiritual foundation is what will
anchor you into your food freedom journey.
If you follow people or businesses that are pushing dieting
terms/culture, I would recommend you do a little consumption cleanse (what
information are you allowing yourself to see on a daily basis and is it
serving you?) to give your brain space to replace those things with other,
more beneficial things. You need to
stop consuming the constant rules and number games - these people and
campaigns are trying to convince you that their way is the only way to
truly be healthy, and that is just NOT true.
What About Emotional Eating?
Yeah, let's talk
about that...it's a hot topic at the moment, for sure! I want to address it from 3 perspectives:
before (prevention), after (grace), and surrender.
Before - how to prevent yourself from emotionally
eating
This may shock you,
but it could also well change the game for your health when you let these
things sink in. Let me just start by
saying emotional eating is normal. It is
very normal that food is a coping tool that you choose to use. This is because food actually sparks an
emotion itself. When you eat something
delicious, does it not make you feel that deliciousness in your body? Removing all emotion from food is not a
realistic goal...Who already feels better about this issue with me having said
that!? Accepting emotional eating was
normal helped me create healthy shifts in my food freedom journey.
Here's the hack:
think of 1 thing that takes you less than 1 minute that you can do first;
before you eat. When you start to feel
some emotion arise and you think about reaching for some food, what is 1 thing
you can do in under 1 minute, first?
When you feel the 'I-want-to-eat-to-cope'
feelings start, just do that 1 thing first and then go eat, or don't. It creates a pause in between, and there is
such power in the pause.
My 1 thing in under
1 minute is a massively, I mean awkwardly huge, deep breath. It just does something for me. And then I just pray for surrender; "God, if this is not good, if I am solving a
problem in the wrong way, or to cope with an emotion in a way that you have not
called me to, then I completely surrender this to you in this moment". And just that alone has SO many times, lead
me in different directions. BUT it does
take time. Your 1 thing in under 1
minute may not help you succeed every time.
What you will notice over time is that even if 1 out of every 5 times
you would normally emotionally eat, you don't because of that 1 thing under 1
minute, that is massive, MASSIVE progress.
You'll start to recognize that and feel it and it will start to happen
more and more often.
After - give yourself grace after you have emotionally
eaten
The other thing here
is for when you do emotionally eat and what you can do after. When we are trying to heal from something, it
doesn't mean that we wake up the next day and never emotionally eat again. It's a process; it takes time. We sometimes slip up, but over time, we have
a little more victory until we have complete victory over this thing.
When you do
emotionally eat, your first reaction is probably anger and
frustration...thoughts like "why did I do
that I again...I said I would stop...I am so gross", and so
on. And that changes absolutely
nothing. So what you can do instead is
to ask yourself "do I feel better and did
I get what I was needing?"
After you answer that for yourself, don't dwell; move on. Dwelling doesn't fix the action you just
took, it just holds you back more. Once
you can answer this, you'll come to a point of more self-awareness rather than
judgment.
Surrender - sometimes you just need to let it happen
If you do your 1
tool in under 1 minute and you still want to eat that thing, let it
happen. It's just like with the sweet
tooth; the resistance and the stress we are adding into emotional eating is
heightening the issue so much more. When
you can let it happen, you learn a lot because you're not so overwhelmed by the
stress that you have on top of the emotional eating.
This has changed the
way that I cope entirely. Instead of
using the energy I have to fight it, and then beat myself up over it, I started
to learn lessons and hear from my body for the first time, and guess what? Emotional eating does not have me wrapped
around its finger anymore. When you choose to let it happen, you are becoming more
aware and more in control which means that your energy is where it should be
and then because of that, maybe you don't eat as much, or you stop earlier, or
knowing that having that food in your house is really not the smartest thing
for you - sometimes it's about creating good boundaries in your life when
you're trying to find food freedom.
FEAR. Fear
Of...
When I talk with
people about food freedom, I always hear: "fear
of [insert reason here]".
Fear of letting go of the money, fear of failing, fear of success and
then not being able to maintain the positive changes. I could go on about this topic. I have fought with fear a lot in my life, and
for the most part, I have overcome it, but my deep, deep fears still exist.
I was afraid of
spending big chunks of money at a time for the fear that I wouldn't get my
monies worth, or I wouldn't earn it back, or I wouldn't succeed in what I
invested my money in and it would feel like a big waste. That was all until I did...in 1 swipe, I
spent $6,000 which was literally all the money I had in my savings. And here we are 2.5 years later and I could
sit and talk to you for hours about what letting go of that money did for my
life.
Here's what I know
about investing rather than trying to get the same results the 'cheap' way, or
on your own: it's just not the same.
It's just not. When we invest,
our commitment looks a whole lot different.
For example, in 2019, I had 1:1 clients who were steady, committed and
super invested. They paid $1,500 for 12
weeks of my high-level health coaching.
They were all in, super focussed, confident and excited. At the same time, I had a couple hundred
women paying $19 per month for my sisterhood mentorship (less than $5 per
week). While they were given loads of
value, far past what they paid for, their commitment looked a lot different and
therefore so did their transformations.
My 1:1 clients had insane transformations. Deep lifestyle transformations that led them
in a whole new direction in life - to start businesses, to end toxic
relationships, to just feeling more free than they ever had in their bodies. And then with the monthly membership, they didn't have anything close to a
these big, deep transformations because their level of commitment was so much
less. They weren't as invested with
their time and energy.
So yeah, spending
money can be scary and we have to be smart about how we spend it, but when you
let go with abundance, confidence, and trust, I guarantee you that you will
surprise yourself. If you believe in WHO
and WHAT you are investing in, choosing to invest in your health or your
business is so wise (this is my story!).
I know a lot of you have been really thinking about the Freedom Method
Mentorship, because I have been talking to a bunch of girls about it in the
DMs. If money is the 1 thing really
holding you back, I hope this message speaks to you and helps with your money
mindset. Sometimes you just have to let
go, completely trust, get invested and see what you're really capable of.
As you prepare for
2020, my prayer for the entire Chasing Freedom community is that we make 2020
the year we actually put our spiritual health first - doing this will radically
change our lives in so many ways. I pray
that we can all live like God is number one in our lives instead of all these
career and body goals taking the front seat.
Our spiritual health is the container for everything else, so let's make
it a priority. When our spiritual health
is strong, everything else is lifted up and we can handle this world when it
shakes us because we are rooted deep in our faith.
If you need more
support with your food freedom journey, then remember, that is EXACTLY why I
created the Freedom Method Mentorship.
Registration is closing SOON - it's the only way to work with me in 2020
for health coaching. I only have a
handful of spots because the 6-month (starting 6 Jan 2020) walk together is
super high touch. Let me join you on
your walk of faith, and experience massive transformation and find true freedom
in your body and mind - for more information or to register, click here. If you have any questions, shoot me a DM on
Instagram or email me info@trainertanner.com.
If you liked this
post, check out episode 78 of my podcast - The
Chasing Freedom Show. You can
find it on Spotify, iTunes,
or SoundCloud. If
you love the episode, screenshot and share it with me on social media @trainertanner
#chasingfreedom.
Xo,
Tan
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