Unworthiness To Abundance - You Are Called
Have
you ever felt unworthy, inadequate or possibly unqualified?
Where
do you dream of going with your life?
Do
you feel qualified enough to get there?
Do
you feel worthy enough to have what you want?
Are
you overcommitting and under-delivering in your life?
I
know these questions all sound a bit 'Debbie Downer', but stick with me...
I
want to help you through these feelings so you can find more confidence and
become more at peace with where you're at in life.
I
know that so many women, including myself, have seasons where they feel
unworthy, unqualified and inadequate.
And it's paralyzing. We have
these dreams, ambitions, thoughts, and ideas about what we want our lives to
be...but the stories of 'I'm not good enough', or 'I don't know enough', or
'I'm not educated enough', or 'I don't have enough experience', or whatever it
may be, hold us back.
So,
today I want to share with you 7 ways to step into worthiness, adequacy and a
life you feel qualified to live. Let's
go, sis...
1. Affirmations
I'm
a woman of affirmation. Affirmation
actually changed my life. I started with
simply journaling affirmations; 2-3 affirmations every single day reminding me of who I am and just speaking truth over my
life. At first, it felt hard, like
something I had to check off the list.
But then I began to understand that these things were going from my mind
down into my heart and I was starting to truly believe them with my soul.
Here
are some affirmations from scripture that can remind you right now of who you
are and who God says that you are.
I am fearfully and wonderfully made - Psalm
139:14
You are the righteousness of God - 2
Corinthians 5:21
Greater is he who is in you than he who is in the
world - 1 John 4:4
You can do all things through Christ, who strengthens
you - Philippians 4:13
You are God's workmanship created in Christ to do
good works - Ephesians 2:10
You
are God's child - Galatians 3:26
Action: whichever one of these stands out most
to you, go and highlight it in your Bible and write about it in your
journal. Ask yourself why it resonates
with you so much? What made you choose this scripture? Dive into it, read around it, and pray on it
this week.
2. Increase self-awareness
What
are your successes and what are your struggles?
What are your strengths and what are your weaknesses? Self-awareness is huge. It helps us to identify why we are doing what
we're doing, why we're not doing what we want to, why we're inconsistent, why we
feel inadequate, and what's really at the root of our actions and
emotions.
So
much of the work that I get to do with women is in really figuring out the root
cause of things so that we can pull that out, plant a little seed of faith and
watch that grow and prosper.
Action: Simply try and be more self-aware of
the areas of life you feel like you excel at, and what areas you feel like you
struggle with most.
No
one is good at everything (and that is OK), but everyone is good at
something. What are you passionate
about? What really lights you up? What are the things that come easy to you (I
can promise you they don't come easy to everyone else)? Take time to really ponder these things. And then do the same with the things that you
struggle with most. When we can be more
self-aware of the things that we're good at and the things that we're
struggling with, we can live more intentional lives.
3. Comparison & negativity
When
we first start to feel unworthy, inadequate, or unqualified, a lot of times
it's because of toxic thoughts of negativity, and just one negative thought can
lead to so many others. It can be oddly
comforting to have that poor, pitiful me mentality when the reality is that
helps no one and nothing invites negativity into your life except you. Negativity won't help you change, transform,
grow or evolve in any way at all.
A
lot of times, the feelings stem from comparison too. Whether it's comparing your chapter 1 to
someone's chapter 20, or you're comparing where you're at, at your age, to
where someone else is at, at the same age.
Action: ask yourself where you find yourself
playing the comparison game most. Is it
in your career? Is it when you're around
your family? Is it when you're on
Instagram? Is it when you're with that
one friend group? Where do you feel like you are in this comparison trap?
Wherever it is, you've got to create some boundaries
around it. You can take this one step
deeper if you like and really analyze WHY you feel like you compare yourself in
this area. Is it because of a past
experience? An emotion that you've been carrying from past failure? A lot of times, when it comes to body image
comparison, it mostly comes from what someone has said to us growing up or there's a sense of failure when you commit to something and then you don't
stick to it, winding you up back where you started, stuck in that vicious
cycle we can get in.
4. Get to KNOW yourself
We've
all wondered at one point or another what we're supposed to do with our
lives. Maybe you're 30 and you're in a
job that you don't love and you're just confused about what the heck to do with
your life. Or maybe you're about to come
out of college and you have a lot of fear right now because you have no idea
how in the world you're supposed to choose what you're going to do for the rest
of your life?
Action: text someone who loves you; someone
who's very close to you and knows you well and ask them to tell you the things
that they love most about you and what they think your gifts are.
I
found this one really hard to do because it feels like you're asking for
affirmation. But here's what it does for you; when you're in this cycle of
beating yourself up, feeling like you're not good enough, at a loss about what
you're gonna do with your life, or you just feel plain lost, a little bit of
affirmation can change our mindset. Being aware of how people perceive you allows you to see yourself in a different light and reminds you just how
valuable you really are. It's not about
pride or ego, it's about not thinking of yourself less, or less of
yourself.
5. Get REAL with yourself
Are
your negative words and self-talk based on how you feel about the way that you
look? I'll tell you what, when I was
struggling with food freedom, dieting, and my body image, it made me feel so
inadequate in so many areas of my life. I
had no clue how much my body image was in the way of my ability to find
freedom. It wasn't until I fully
surrendered that I was set free and could begin living an abundant life with
Christ.
Action: answer this question ^^ for
yourself. And then rewrite your
story. Maybe you can turn your
insecurities into a gift and step fully into an abundant life. Instead of focusing the things you don't
like about yourself or you're insecure about, move what you're excited about
and you're proud of to the forefront.
How would this change your relationship with others and God? How would it allow you to live with gratitude
instead of stress, anxiety and overwhelm?
Dig deep here.
Imagine yourself the way you
want God to see you.
6. Where are you looking for validation?
I
know this might seem contradictory because I just said to go ask for
affirmation if you need it. But here, I
mean on a day to day basis. There's a
difference between constantly seeking validation, and purely asking for
affirmation from someone who really loves you to help you move forward. It's the intention behind it. It's important for us to receive affirmation
and just as important to give it. So
make sure you tell people how amazing they are and how they've impacted your
life.
Action: ask yourself who or what really
validates you? Is it your boyfriend and
what he's saying about you? Is it the success that you have right now in your career?
Is it within your marriage or your relationships? Is it how you're doing in school? Is it your
physical appearance and what the scale says?
Is it how you feel in your clothes or what you see in the mirror? Is it photos on Instagram?
Where
do you go currently for validation to feel worthy, to feel accepted, to feel
loved, to feel confident? Is it to
God? Sometimes we focus so much on the
small things that we miss the big picture; our mission to love God. I know how it can feel easier to go to others
for validation. Sometimes I go to my
husband or my business for validation.
It used to be the mirror. But
mostly, it's now God. Through seeking
validation in God, you'll find a wholeness that you can't find in anything or
anyone else.
7. Choose eternal vision - put your Jesus goggles on
I
don't want any of my clients coming back to me in a year needing my coaching
again. I want them to be set free from
the things that they felt bound from. I
want them to do what they actually say they're going to do. That's my goal for all women. That's why I'm a health coach. I want to help women work on their internal
health so they can go live out the life that God has called them to without
feeling like a slave in their body.
Action: think about your favorite person on
this earth. Maybe it's your mom. Maybe it's your best friend. Maybe it's a
youth group leader you had. Maybe it's
just some random person in your life that you really admire; a podcaster
or author. Whoever that person is, I
want you to list 7 things that you love about them right now. Then just sit and think about those 7 things; the reasons why you love your most favorite person. Close your eyes and imagine a sit-down chat
with Jesus and think about how he looks at you and what he would say if you
asked him why he loves you.
I
guarantee you that the way you feel and speak about why you love your favorite
person is the same way God feels about you.
He would hold you by your shoulders and tell you the same things you'd
tell them, but probably even greater things...because he's God. And the truth is, He can't say anything about
you that is greater THAN you. The way
God thinks of you is exactly how great you are!
Isn't that crazy? And yet we live
our lives, beating ourselves up, feeling inadequate, feeling unworthy,
forgetting this huge blessing of life that we have, feeling like we're not
enough.
We
can all choose eternal vision. We can
put on our Jesus goggles every single day.
It's a daily faith. I call it
chasing freedom because it's active...we are active kingdom builders.
Freedom Method Mentorship
If
unworthiness is something you struggle with, then make sure you get on
the Freedom Method Mentorship Waitlist today. Getting on this waitlist will secure your
spot in the Freedom Method Mentorship Program AND you'll get a FREE month of
coaching support!
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If this post resonated with you, take a listen to episode 72 of my podcast - The Chasing Freedom Show. You can find it on Spotify, iTunes, or SoundCloud. If you love the episode, screenshot and share it with me on social media @trainertanner #chasingfreedom.
Xo,
Tan
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